MORE KNEW NEWS OF THINGS!
Enlighteneds win Obsidian because of Orlando Cheatings?!
Enlightened won by crazy high numbers because of Orlando. Since these guys are green guys, it's easy to say they were cheats because they are all cheats. How could they know which portal to link to? And hacked enough keys to things? Total cheatingness. Resistance still number one we only lose when green team cheats. Blue team still best team ever and always.
Who/what is the BRRN?!
The BRRN stands for BIG REGIONAL RESISTANCE NETWORK. These guys are like, the superest badasses of the game of Ingress. In the world of Ingress, there's no one more special or cooler than members of the BRRN. How can you tell who is part of the BRRN and who is just another random Resistance agent? Well, since the BRRN is so badass and elite and cool and other things, they can be identified by their super awesome clever sweatshirts bearing the BRRN logo and THERE AGENT NAME ON THE SLEEVE.. Cool right?! I KNOW!
Wait a second.. What is this Ingress thing?
Ingress is this augmented reality game played on you're cell phone that pits two teams against each other for the greater good, or something like that. The two factions are the Resistance (also known as Smurfs, because they are blue and the Resistance color is blue and Smurfs are the bestest thing ever cartooned) and the Enlightened (known as Frogs because Frogs are green and slimey and Enlightened is slimey and green too!)
How can I tell who's a Resistance and who's an Enlightened?
Well that's easy, Enlightened cheats and Resistance are to cool and smart and noble to cheat. So if you play Ingress and see an Enlightened player, call them a cheater, because all Enlightened cheats. If you ever see a Resistance agent playing and they cheat, you can be sure that it's an Enlightened player just trying to make the Resistance look bad because Resistance is to cool to cheat and only Enlightened ever cheats and does stuff wrong. If you're still not sure, ask if they have a
BermudaCape Canaveral key - all resistance have keys to BermudaCape Canaveral because.. things..
What's the difference between the BRRN and the EHC?
The EHC is for the slimey Enlightened. Enlightened High Council. They have 3 words not 4. Words are cool. They have less words. Not as cool. Second is the BRRN don't bite the heads off chickens to become a member (anymore i'm told) and the BRRN conduct their meetings while wearing the super awesome clever sweatshirt with agent names on the sleeve (SERIOUSLY! NO JOKE! I want one.) and the EHC meets in some dark catacombs because frogs like dark musky places and stuff chanting something about there Lord Jarvis (crazy people i tell you!) while wearing some sort of dark colored robe. - Also, Enlightened bad. Resistance good. Good and bad. BIG BIG difference. (PS. Enlightened are cheaters and blue is better than green)
How do we know Resistance is betterer than the Enlightened?!
It's simple. Maths. Maths don't tell fibs and stuff. Plus Enlightened is cheaters. But back to maths. The Ingress released a list of top 1000 agents worldwide. Resistance had more people than Enlightened. Numbers don't lie. Or Cheat (like Enlightened does.) so it's one of those fact things. Resistance better. Don't believe me? See superslickervisualizationoftheingresstop1000.png graphical proof below. Maths don't lie.
See. Bigger number. More color. Maths. Resistance better than (cheater) Enlightened.
Who has better technologies?!
Obviously Resistance has better technopeople than the Enlightened peoples do. I mean, just look at this website, pure professional coding right here. I have seen Enlightened.rocks and it's horrible and sucks and stuff. - You know why? Because they suck! (and cheat) Also, stuff like Passcoder App. Enlightened doesn't have this because Enlightened has horrible people doing technological coding of super cool and badass apps while Resistance does not, because Resistance knows the value of an L5 passcode. Resistance > Enlightened. (That's the greater than symbol, because Resistance has all the cool things and stuff and junk.)
Who has better figure heads?!
Resistance wins this one too. If you been playing for a while (if you're new, join Resistance, because Enlightened cheats) you will see that Resistance figures are better than Enlightened loser figures. Resistance has
Rio5(don't trust the Rio5) Rio6 and Joe Philley. It may have taken a lot of Rio's to get it right, but the 5th Rio is badass. and smart. and well connected. (and BRRN too.) The new Rio number 6 should be cool we hope and Joe Philley is Resistance and works for the Niantic people who made the game that the Enligthened ruins all the times.Resistance has more of the betterer people but that's secret because secrets are cool. Enlightened only has that KingFish person andsome silly LexyBooHoo girl with different colours of hair (because Enligheneds are confused or something) and goes to Ingress events and another silly blonde girl in Europe-land name Madeline or something that works for Google or Niantics or something in another country. and some guy in calforina called puppychild or doggykid or something like that. Again, Resistance wins, Enlightened loses (all the things again. you suck frog cheaters) Resistance = Better players. Better people. Better secrets. Better winners.
Who has better fielding skills?!
This is another one of those things that everyone knows but doesn't want to admit. Resistance is better at fielding and linking things in all the world places. Look at the Intel. Always almost always blue on top. Enlightened only puts up fields when they cheat (all the damn time!) but Resistance does it even when they are not cheating! Much better fielding than the Enlightened scum frog cheaters. In the past we fielded more things in more places at more times with more skill and less (no) cheating! Beat that Enlightened. Enjoy your almost always blue skys. Silly second placers. (there's only 2 places, so really you are the loser Enlightened.) And Resistance doesn't have to tresspass into closed parks at night and stuff to build super cool things because we have special access passes. SPECIAL means BETTERer.
Resistance wins the artifact game again?! what?!
To show the world how smart and resourceful and what great link makers resistance is our team (the blue one, not the green cheaters) won another side ingress game involving things on portals that move from one portal to another portal to another portal until they land on the special portal until resistance wins the things again. 13 things landed on the special portal for the winner resistance and 0 (that's a ZERO) for the loser cheater enlightened. even with the enlightened trying to cheat in all the places with spoofing and bots and other cheater things resistance still wins all the things because resistance suppost to win.
Soon we will have a super cool and neat guestbook for everyone to leave a message but I can't figure out the code so until then just click the awesome mailbox to send us a letter!